You are not invited | Wedding

I am not what you would expect from the usual bridezilla. I definitely went against a few rules that other ‘Who to invite to your wedding’ guides suggest.

I have never had a dream to have a big wedding because the thought of entertaining 200 guests and trying to speak with every single one of them for a two minute chitchat so no one feels missed is pointless and actually quite offensive to me. It sounds more like a networking event rather than my vision of an intimate and close celebration. Where is the time to have proper fun when you have to circulate from guest to guest? Seriously, when would I have time to try my wedding cake?

More people also means more drama, more organisation, more emails with repetitive questions, and even more people offended that they were not invited.

‘How could you invite Auntie Dorothy but not Uncle John?’

‘Is Amy coming? If she is I would rather not sit nearby.’

‘Surely there is going to be space for friend of a family, who was playing with you when you were a toddler during this hot Sunday in August?’

I think that I should mention that if I was to invite all of my family there would be over 200 guests just from my side alone. Thank you but hell no, that is not the dream wedding I want. Let’s face it, I want to be surrounded with people who actually have been part of my life rather than the ones who appeared once on a random photo from over 20 years ago.

I absolutely understand why people would love to have a big wedding but quite simply on a daily or weekly basis I do not speak nor really think of 200 people. It works both ways, they are not in touch with me either. Why would I invite them then? My friends’ circle is small but loyal and fun.

I am not going to force myself to have a big fat wedding if that is not the style of the life I have chosen. Therefore I gave myself permission to be assertive when it comes to that, but first I had a talk with the family events’ CEO aka Grandma.

Thankfully other than two little discussions with my beloved grandma, who in her previous life must have been a dragon or something due to her temperament, I received her support in my plans. Which is a big deal in my matriarchal family.

Am I worried that Uncle John will be offended that I did not invite him? Not really, actually I would not be surprised if he only knows that I was getting married because of Facebook.

What would be your 'wedding guest' criteria?

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  1. I absolutely understand why people would love to have a big wedding but quite simply on a daily or weekly basis I do not speak nor really think of 200 people. Sigh! this line is gold. I would do just that invite few people only!

  2. This is so interesting - I come from a massive family and I've never thought of not inviting everyone because of the drama it would create. But you're right - I couldn't care less if family members I haven't seen in years were there or not, and I doubt they would either

    Steph -

    1. I do not really think I will have any big fights about it. At the end of the day I just think that people have better things to do than looking for an issue where there isn't one. ;)

  3. Great thinking! Invite who you want and who is a part of your life. Our Indian wedding consist of over 500 people, it can be crazy! It can also leave you broke which is just stupidity!

    1. I really do not think I could cope with the pressure of possibility going bankrupt because of a wedding. The stress would be too much for me to enjoy the wedding.